A sex advice book from rock stars is mostly voyeuristic

Paul Miles
“Sex Tips From Rock Stars”
Omnibus Press, 97801084938-404-9, Softcover, 272 pages, $19.95

By Gillian G. Gaar

This book is one you’ll read more for voyeuristic purposes than to get any useful sex tips. Nor are all the tips about sex; there are chapters on marriage and divorce, for example. Finally, the “rock stars” in question are decidedly of the b-list variety. Motorhead’s Lemmy is most recognizable name; others include Joel O’Keeffe (Airbourne), Rob Patterson (Otep), and Bruce Kulick (who’s played with Meat Loaf and Kiss, in addition to his solo work). Allison Robertson, from the Donnas, is the sole female (and it must be said her answers are pretty tame).

Most tips are of the common sense variety. Drinking too much isn’t helpful for a sexual encounter. As far “techniques,” different people like different things (“I think you’ve really got to ask the woman” says Vazquez, from Damone). More men will take maturity and experience over youth and inexperience (or ideally youth and experience). Men split 50/50 over whether they like breast enhancements, but there’s a decided preference for having the woman shave her pubic hair (and about half the men cop to trimming as well).

Some inadvertent insights are also revealed. Biohazard’s Evan Seinfeld comes off as a sad character, a rocker and an “adult movie star” whose wife is eager for him to film himself having sex with “the hottest, youngest” women he can find, as they aren’t “jaded” yet (he also cites disturbing a preference for “thinners,” women who weigh under 105 pounds; someone who’s usually viewed as having an eating disorder). Or maybe she’d not that eager after all; the last sentence of his bio in the book has the punchline — Seinfeld and his wife have since separated.

Overall, a fun book to skim through. But the “stars” are definitely wrong about one thing. Blondes do have more fun.

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